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Chapters & Sections (92)
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0:04
Growing up with Secret
1:03
Bullying and Finding God
1:34
Pursuing Priesthood
2:05
Coming to Terms with Sexuality
3:39
Inspiration from a Tragic Story
4:13
Recognizing Elements in the Story and Continuing to Research
4:46
Reaching Out to Alana's Mother and Building a Connection
5:17
Phone and Texting Relationship with Alana's Mother
6:18
Author's Background and Conversion Therapy Experience
7:22
Questions about the Author's Journey and Conversion Therapy
8:25
Discussion of Homosexuality as a Disqualifier for Priesthood
9:27
Conversion Therapy Narratives and Pathology of Homosexuality
10:30
Nurturing Qualities of Gay Men and Priestly Role
12:03
Most Priests are Gay, Church's Reliance on Closeted Individuals
12:34
Historical Context and Political Factors Influencing the Church's Stance
13:04
Church's Difficulty in Adapting to Changing Social Norms and Political Context
14:05
Abuse of Power by Closeted Gay Men in the Church and its Impact on Document Writing
15:09
Large Organizations' Resistance to Change and the Difficulty of Becoming a Priest
15:41
Inspiration to Dedicate Life to Church
16:13
Volunteering and Serving the Homeless
16:43
The Stakes of Following a Path to God
17:15
Discovering Alana's Journals and Inner Life
18:48
Offering Support to Alana's Family
19:49
Finding One's Path and the Prices of Belonging
20:21
Investigating Alana's Life and Death
20:51
Pivotal Moments in the Story's Development
21:25
Meeting Alana's Family and Collecting Material
22:28
Producing the Pilot Episode and Finding a Collaborator
23:00
Gaining Access to Journals and Trust with Alana's Mother
24:02
Sharing Personal Story and Parallels with Alana's Story
24:34
Defining Conversion Therapy and its Historical Practices
25:07
Early Psychoanalytic Approach to Conversion Therapy
26:09
Freudian Theories and their Application to Sexual Orientation
27:11
Parental Influence and Trauma in Shaping Sexual Orientation
28:15
Spiritual and Psychological Roots of Homosexuality
28:46
Conversion Therapy Practices and Remedies
29:16
Personal Experiences with Conversion Therapy
30:17
The Decline of Conversion Therapy and its Persistence
32:21
Initial Reaction to Parents and Pursuing Therapy
32:54
Therapy Sessions and Group Setting
33:25
Conversion Therapy Theory and Approach
33:59
Reliving Traumatic Experiences and Reconstructing Narrative
34:29
Deconstructing Attraction to Traumatic Experiences
36:04
Finding a New Narrative through Sports
36:34
Personal Experience with Judo and Bullying
37:37
Theoretical Background on Healing through Masculinity
38:08
Verbal Sparring and Insulting as a Form of Connection
38:38
Comparing Physical Strength with Wife
39:43
Common Childhood Experiences and Their Impact
40:14
Conversion Therapy's Compelling Nature
40:45
Personal Experiences and Narrative Creation
41:48
Internal Struggle and Decision-Making Process
42:50
Complicated Identity and Belonging
43:21
Alana's Church Community and Secret Life
44:58
The Psychic Toll of Living a Dual Life
45:28
Alana's Struggles and Trauma
46:32
The Impact of Conversion Therapy
47:37
The Young Woman's History of Suicide Attempts and Treatment
48:09
The Final Hiking Trip and Search Efforts
48:41
The Discovery of Her Body and the Coroner's Ruling
49:12
The Podcast's Approach to Presenting Information and Speculation
50:16
The Role of Education in Her Tragic Story
50:47
Her Secret Life and the Conversations with Her Mother
51:50
Unapproachable Parents and Guilt
52:22
Grieving and Regret
52:53
Egregious Advice from Spiritual Leaders
53:23
Conversion Therapy and Shame
55:30
Initial Partnership with Tenderfoot TV and Show Production
56:30
Collaboration with Small Team at Tenderfoot TV
57:03
Intimate and Vulnerable Storytelling Experience
57:35
Podcast's Resonance and Public Vulnerability
3h 45m⏭ 2
2h 20m⏭ 1
1h 49m⏭ 2
2h 15m⏭ 4
2h 11m⏭ 2
2h 28m⏭ 1
2h 54m⏭ 3
2h 23m⏭ 2
2h 32m⏭ 3
2h 24m⏭ 2
1h 43m⏭ 2
2h 1m⏭ 1
1h 42m⏭ 3
1h 18m⏭ 4
1h 6m⏭ 1
1h 6m⏭ 3
38m
2h 37m⏭ 2
2h 0m⏭ 2
1h 14m⏭ 2
1h 9m⏭ 3
1h 17m
1h 1m
1h 14m⏭ 1