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Chapters & Sections (157)
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0:00
Learning to Get Away with Things
1:02
Opportunity and Family Dynamics
2:05
Growing Up with Addiction
3:39
Connection with Grandmother and Adrenaline Junkie Relationship with Dad
4:11
Impact of Grandmother's Passing on Family Dynamics and Self-Identity
4:42
Challenges with Connecting and Building Relationships
5:12
Meeting an Older Man and Pursuing a Career in Criminal Justice
7:16
Introduction to Re-Entry Programs and Personal Experience
7:47
First Criminal Justice Experience as a Teenager
8:17
Consequences and Parental Reaction to First Offense
9:20
Learning to Talk One's Way Out of Trouble
10:55
Justifying Shoplifting and Blaming Others
11:25
Riding Motorcycles for a High
11:56
Party Culture and Acceptance of Drinking
12:28
Mother's Problematic Drinking and Its Impact
13:32
Self-Perception and Low Self-Esteem
15:06
Losing connection with grandmother and finding it again
15:37
Introduction to drugs by a significant other
16:08
First experience with cocaine and opiates
16:39
Matthew B Cox's story and its impact on the speaker
19:16
The partner's work habits and drug use
19:46
Age difference and manipulation
20:18
Dependence on the partner for drugs
20:49
Abusive relationship and first physical altercation
22:52
Feeling Overwhelmed and Vulnerable
23:24
Avoiding Conflict and Unresolved Issues
23:55
Realization of Abusive Behavior
24:56
Discovery of Infidelity and Heartache
25:26
Confronting the Truth and Emotional Turmoil
26:27
Infidelity and Emotional Damage
27:27
Turning to Drugs for Comfort
28:28
Motivations and Expectations in Relationships
29:01
Abusive Moments and Leaving the Relationship
30:34
Meeting the Children's Father and Starting a Romantic Relationship
32:06
Realizing the Children's Father is Supplying Her Drug Habit
32:36
Struggling with Mental Health and Quitting a Job
34:40
Quitting opiates and moving in with mom
35:11
Telling mom about pregnancy and quitting drugs
35:43
Struggling with mental health and addiction
37:50
Finding heroin in Sean's truck and using it
38:21
Moving from place to place and struggling with addiction
39:56
CPS involvement and loss of parental rights
40:27
Rehabilitation and conflicting desires for the child's well-being
41:59
Pregnancy and conflicting emotions about fatherhood
46:43
Returning to Old Habits and Struggling with Maintenance
47:14
Getting Promoted at Work Despite Addiction
47:46
Guilt and Shame from Continued Addiction
48:17
Maintaining Addiction Despite Responsibilities
48:49
Quitting Job and Relapse Consequences
49:52
Moving Out of Mom's House and Supporting Children
50:54
The Speaker's Addiction and Daily Struggles
51:26
Getting Involved in Drug Dealing
51:57
The Speaker's Addiction and Family Life
52:29
Regretting Past Choices and Finding Love for Self
53:31
Approaching the Situation with Caution
55:03
Getting a Vehicle Registered in Arizona
55:35
Crossing the Border and Registering the Vehicle
56:06
Staying in Mexico with Family and Continuing Drug Use
57:10
Conversations about Transportation and Secondary Check
1:02:23
Feeling Embarrassed and Used
1:02:56
Loss of Freedom and Identity
1:03:28
Reflection on Past Experience
1:03:58
Current Situation and Plans
1:04:30
Surprise and Disappointment
1:05:01
Revelation of Government Corruption
1:06:04
Building a Private Militia and Plotting Coup
1:08:08
Arrest and Interrogation
1:10:13
Mom's Perspective on the Pain Caused
1:10:17
Initial Interrogation and Confusion
1:11:19
Emotional Response to Discovery of Meth
1:11:50
Processing and Medical Holding Cell
1:12:21
Heroin Withdrawal and Court Appearance
1:14:28
Prison Sentence Length and Mitigating Factors
1:15:33
Transportation and Distribution Charges
1:16:03
Treatment Program Experience
1:18:40
Initial Reaction to Prison Sentence and Plea Agreement
1:19:11
Pre-Sentencing Interview and Positive Aspects of Life
1:20:13
Discussion of Sentence Options and Probation Recommendation
1:21:48
Sentencing Date and Meeting with Potential Partner
1:22:19
Emotional Support for Family During Sentencing
1:23:19
Personal Convictions and Acceptance of Consequences
1:24:21
Gratitude and Positive Outlook Despite Circumstances
1:25:53
Arrival and Initial Impressions
1:26:25
Meeting Other Inmates and Sharing Stories
1:27:58
Realizing the Complexity of Drug Trafficking
1:28:29
Art App and Community-Based Therapy
1:30:01
Initial Thoughts on Manipulation and Program
1:31:04
Challenges in the Prison Program
1:32:07
Dropping Out and Returning to the Program
1:33:43
Accountability and Rules in Prison
1:34:15
Difficulty Opening Up in the Program
1:35:16
Manipulation and Entitlement Issues
1:36:17
Personal Growth and Feedback Skills
1:37:19
Criticism and Lack of Support
1:38:57
Shame and Verbal Confrontation
1:39:29
Intrusive Listening and Manipulation
1:41:05
Manipulative and Horrible Program Experience
1:42:09
Cavalier Attitude and Lack of Engagement
1:42:39
Harsh Reality and Motivation
1:44:43
Recognizing Selfishness and Narcissism
1:45:14
Addressing Personal Issues
1:46:48
Working on Selfishness and Improving Relationships
1:48:21
Revealing Prison Relationships and Secrets
1:49:22
Prison Life, Addiction, and Support
1:49:54
Confronting Suspicion and Betrayal
1:50:57
Prison Life, Reality TV, and Reflections
1:51:28
Falling in Love and Meeting Women in Prison
1:51:58
Staying Connected with People Who Did Well
1:52:59
Uncomfortable Situation in Halfway House
1:53:31
Learning Opportunity and Finding Like-Minded People
1:54:02
Working in Treatment and Home Confinement Experience
1:55:05
Fear of Making Mistakes and Being Triggered
1:56:08
Finding Purpose in Business Development
1:57:09
Building a Name and Reputation in the Industry
1:58:43
Overcoming Addiction and Making a Difference
1:59:15
Helping Family Members and Finding Redemption
2:00:18
Appreciation for Support and Reflection on the Journey
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