About this episodeThis episode features comedian Alex Tarno discussing his experiences with online dating, past encounters with …AI summary
This episode features comedian Alex Tarno discussing his experiences with online dating, past encounters with sex work, and his journey through alcoholism and mental health challenges. The conversation blends crude humor with personal anecdotes about dating app strategies, awkward social interactions, and a detailed guide to maximizing value at Chipotle. Key takeaways include the effectiveness of humor in dating profiles and the importance of sobriety, while providing entertainment through wild personal stories.
Key takeaways 4
Dating App Strategy: Using specific, humorous, or self-deprecating prompts (e.g., 'dating a golden retriever in a tuxedo') can filter for compatible matches who appreciate the humor, acting as a 'green flag' test.
Ordering Hack: To maximize value at Chipotle, order multiple scoops of expensive ingredients like steak and cheese separately rather than one large scoop, as staff may under-scoop when combining items.
Social Interaction: When approached by street vendors (e.g., candy sellers), a humorous deflection or ignoring the pitch is effective; engaging in debate often leads to unwanted persistence.
Personal Safety/Health: In cases of medical emergencies like seizures, physical intervention (slapping) is not a valid first-aid response and can cause further harm; professional medical help is required.
Notable quotes 4AI-generated: wording and quote attribution may be wrong. Use the play link to verify.
“"Dating me is like dating a golden retriever in a tuxedo."”
▶ 2:44A humorous Hinge prompt used to describe personality, contrasting with the 'pig' joke.
“"I slapped her in the face. As hard as I could. ... She came back."”
▶ 12:54A shocking anecdote about attempting to wake up a woman having a seizure during an intimate moment.
“"Triple steak. Triple it up. I just can't wait."”
▶ 0:00The podcast's catchphrase, reflecting the guest's love for large quantities of food.
“"You're looking for a woman with sunglasses. Who can eat and make fun of me and I can live with and eat blue cheese to my heart's content."”
▶ 4:42Describing the ideal partner traits on a dating app.
Chapters & Sections (44)▼
0:00Roasting Hinge Dating Profile Bioschapter2
1:44Critiquing Hinge Dating Profile Bios
3:22Dating a Pig and Tough Women
4:46Dating App Strategies and Humorchapter2
6:26Dating App Opening Lines and Cat Humor
8:22Dating App Strategies and In-Person Pickup
10:52Story of partner's seizure during intimacychapter1
12:22Slapping partner to stop seizure
14:49Sexual encounter mishap and Miami prostitutionchapter1
16:58Miami Prostitution Stories and Pricing
19:20Uber mishaps and massage parlor stereotypeschapter1
21:49Massage parlor stereotypes and pricing
23:03Prostitution experiences and losing itemschapter3
24:31Awkward Prostitution Encounters and Business Talk
26:43Server experiences and payment disputes
28:14Losing items and disorganization
30:49Losing Items and Sixth Street Encounterschapter2
32:31Losing Items on Sixth Street
33:46Navigating Homeless Encounters and Street Vendors
37:12Street Vendors and Dating Older Womenchapter2
38:49Street Vendor Encounters and Mall Shopping
40:07Sneaker Cleaning Sales Tactics and Dating Older Women
44:10Anecdotes Attracting Older Womenchapter1
47:14Massage Parlor Encounter with Older Woman
48:38Childhood Jobs and Foot Fetish Discussionchapter2
50:34Impact of Foot Fetish on Social Interaction
51:37Foot Fetish and School Secretary Anecdote
53:00Psych Ward Experience and Alcohol Withdrawal Hallucinationschapter1
55:04Severe Alcohol Withdrawal Hallucinations
57:19Psych Ward Experience and Sobrietychapter2
59:25Anecdote about stolen socks and salmon
1:00:44Salmon fingers and prune juice
1:02:22Dating App Strategies and Interracial Preferenceschapter2
1:04:38Dating App Preferences and Interracial Dynamics
1:06:30Interracial Dating App Strategies
1:09:07Pie Addiction and Restaurant Work Storieschapter1
1:11:36Sippy Cup Prank and Beer Spill
1:13:24Buffet Stories and Chipotle Order Dramachapter2
1:14:44Japanese Grill Buffet Stories
1:16:00Buffet Indulgence and Chipotle Order Drama
1:17:48Chipotle Ordering Strategy and Excesschapter3
1:18:58Excessive Cheese Requests
1:19:57Chipotle Guacamole and Cheese Ordering Issues